Shane Read online

  Shane

  Copyright © 2019 by Mary A. Wasowski

  Cover Design by Francessca’s PR & Design

  Editing by Joe Marron

  Formatting by JT Formatting

  All rights reserved.

  Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products, bands, and/or restaurants referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

  License Notes

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  The brightest stars in the sky are the ones that shine down on us.

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Prologue: Another time…another life

  Chapter One: Still broken

  Chapter Two: Breaking point

  Chapter Three: Crossroads

  Chapter Four: Forgiveness

  Chapter Five: Hope is not lost

  Chapter Six: Wrecked

  Chapter Seven: Hard truth

  Chapter Eight: Healed

  Chapter Nine: I hate therapy

  Chapter Ten: The road back to us

  Chapter Eleven: Falling into place

  Chapter Twelve: Surprise guest…

  Chapter Thirteen: Not at all what we thought

  Chapter Fourteen: Doorstop miracle

  Chapter Fifteen: He’s not ours, but can he be?

  Chapter Sixteen: We can do this

  Chapter Seventeen: Is this right for us?

  Chapter Eighteen: Plus one

  Chapter Nineteen: Making a family

  Chapter Twenty: Dreams do come true

  Chapter Twenty-One: The journey begins

  Chapter Twenty-Two: Six months later

  Chapter Twenty-Three: My loves

  Chapter Twenty-Four: The visit

  Bonus Scene: Tenley’s truth

  A Note from the Author

  Acknowledgments

  Other Books by Mary A. Wasowski

  About the Author

  Shane

  “I must be crazy for allowing you to talk me into doing this on the night before my wedding,” I said to Jagger as I froze my ass off on the frozen lake. “What the hell are we doing out here?” I asked my crazy best friend.

  “We are doing something that I didn’t have a chance to do when I married Tenley last month, so I am passing on a Parrish family tradition down to you.”

  “And what might that be? We freeze our balls off? Yeah, Jag that will make for an interesting honeymoon with Shelby.”

  “Come on, Shane. Where’s your sense of adventure? We used to do this all the time when we were younger. It was fun then, and it’s fun now.”

  “It’s not the same without Jamie. God! I miss him something fierce.”

  Jamie was Tenley’s big brother and ours too. He was the best friend we would ever have in our lifetime. His life was cut short by cancer that had more power than modern medicine or all our faith combined, and now he was up in the stars watching over us.

  “We all do, man, but he’s here. Just raise your eyes up to the sky. His star is shining brightly down on us tonight.”

  “You really think so?”

  “I know so. He was there in New York too when I married his sister. He’s always with us Shane. You have to believe that, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  I said nothing more on the subject, and although I froze, we did manage to catch some fish and talk for hours about all the great times we shared as friends. A conversation would not be complete without the mention of Jamie; he was our spirit animal in the sky. He always knew the right words to say to us when we needed to hear them, and if he ever doubted his own advice, he certainly didn’t show it to us.

  I shouted, “I’m getting married tomorrow, Jagger! Holy shit! I wasn’t sure if I was ever going to see this day.”

  “Tell me about it. It’s how I felt when I reunited with Tenley, and then to marry her in the same city she left me for all those years ago is just a mind-spinning, knock-you-on-your-ass epiphany life moment.”

  “Wow, that’s one way to put it, but technically she went to Yale first, then came to New York.”

  “Gee, thanks, bud, for the correction.”

  “Just keeping it real. No problem, Jag.”

  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought that up. We agreed a long time ago that the past is the past and that’s where it shall remain.”

  “I know you’re still in the newlywed phase, but you’re happy, right?”

  “Immensely. I feel nothing else. Tenley is the other half of my soul. I can’t breathe without her. Having her away for five years was the hardest test of all the strength I possessed.”

  “Will I have that kind of love with Shelby? The kind you can’t survive without?”

  “Does your heart race when she’s near?”

  “Like a heart attack.”

  “Shane, you’re ready, and she is too. You are going to have an amazing life with Shelby, and our kids are going to grow up together as best friends, and we will teach them everything about life, this ranch, and a lot of things the women in our lives would probably have us wait on, but yeah, she’s the one. Let’s get you home so you can get some sleep and marry the love of your life tomorrow.”

  “Thanks, Jag, and I mean for everything. Having you forgive me was something I never believed would happen, and now you’re standing up for me tomorrow as my best man.”

  “Yeah well, I had some free time on my hands.”

  “Shane and Shelby have written their own vows to each other to unite them today in holy matrimony. The rings, please?”

  Jagger handed me the rings that would soon be on Shelby’s hand forever. I was so nervous, but when I looked at my beautiful bride, I calmed and looked over to the reverend to continue.

  “Shane, please take Shelby’s hand, and you can begin whenever you’re ready.”

  “Thank you, sir.”

  I took Shelby’s hand in mine and placed a kiss on her soft skin before reciting my vows. She looked stunning today in her strapless gown. I was weak in the knees when I saw her walking down the aisle toward me, passing our family and friends all smiling and crying as she got closer to the altar. I almost swept her up into my arms but held back. I knew if I kissed her, I’d be done. She squeezed my hand a little and brought me back to the reason we were here.

  I whispered, “Sorry, babe, just lost in a good memory.”

  “I figured, but I thought I could help you along.”

  “Always looking out for me.”

  The entire church laughed, and then I smiled back at my bride, taking a deep breath as I began to recite my vows:

  “You know me better than anyone else in this world, and somehow still you manage to love me. You are my best friend and one true love. There is still a part of me today that cannot believe that I’
m the one who gets to marry you. I love you, Shelby, so very much. You are every part of me that’s good, and these are my promises to you that I pledge forever and will always honor for the rest of my life.

  I promise to encourage your compassion, because that is what makes you unique and wonderful.

  I promise to nurture your dreams, because through them your soul shines.

  I promise to help shoulder our challenges. For there is nothing we cannot face if we stand together.

  I promise to be your partner in all things, not possessing you but working with you as a part of the whole.

  Lastly, I promise you perfect love and perfect trust, for one lifetime with you could never be enough. This is my sacred vow to you, my equal in all things.”

  Jagger stepped up behind me and patted me on my back, congratulating me for getting through my vows without totally passing out. I’d been so nervous that I would forget a line, but I stayed up half the night memorizing everything I wanted to say.

  I watched her hand off the bouquet to her maid of honor and then turn back to me, trying very hard not to cry.

  “Wow! I didn’t write as much as you did, and now I’m feeling kind of silly for what I did write, but I hope it conveys how much you mean to me and just how honored I am that I’m about to become your wife.” I smiled and hit her with a wink to put her at ease.

  She released a deep breath and unfolded the small piece of paper she had tucked inside of her bouquet.

  “I take you to be my partner for life.

  I promise above all else to live in truth with you and to communicate fully and fearlessly.

  I give you my hand and my heart as a sanctuary of warmth and peace. I pledge my love, devotion, faith, and honor as I join my life to yours.

  These are my promises to you. I love you, Shane.”

  I mouthed the words “I love you” and then said, “This is it, babe.”

  “Shelby and Shane, you have expressed your love to one another through the commitment and promises you have just made. It is with these in mind that I pronounce you husband and wife. You have kissed a thousand times, maybe more. But today the feeling is new. No longer simply partners and best friends, you have become husband and wife and can now seal the agreement with a kiss. Today, your kiss is a promise. You may kiss the bride.”

  The entire church erupted in applause as I took Shelby in my arms and kissed her beautiful plump lips which sealed us as one, forever as husband and wife. I’d never been happier.

  “Shane!!! Omg! Get in here.”

  I practically dropped my coffee and darted up the stairs two at a time until I reached our bedroom, where my wife was jumping up and down in excitement.

  “Baby, what’s wrong?” I gasped, and that’s when she handed me the white stick with two pink lines on it.

  “You’re pregnant? OMG! You have a baby in there?” I said and then dropped to my knees to place my hands on her flat stomach.

  She giggled in her sweet voice, probably thinking I was being silly, but I didn’t care. She made me so incredibly happy, and this news was the icing on the cake.

  “I can’t believe it, babe. Right now, there’s a baby in your belly?” I whispered as I was getting choked up while stuttering over my words. I placed a kiss on her flat stomach where our baby would grow, and then I got up on my feet to kiss her.

  “I am. We are. Are you happy?”

  “Extremely. We’re having a baby!” I shouted as loud as my voice allowed me to.

  I threw my arms in the air and then swept my beautiful wife off her feet and made love to her for the rest of the day.

  The past six months had been like a dream. We found out we were having a son, which I could not be more pleased about. Our son would grow up with Jamie Jr., Jagger and Tenley’s boy, and I knew they would be best friends like Jagger and I were. I couldn’t wait to teach him how to ride and do all the things that made my childhood awesome. Our fathers were our teachers, and there was not one thing we didn’t know how to do on this ranch, and now we got to pass all of that knowledge to our sons.

  Surrounded by pillows all around us, I held my beautiful wife in my arms. I loved these moments with her. She had her head on my chest, and I thought she might be asleep. Then she let out a soft sigh.

  I asked, “Hey, what are you thinking about? You are too quiet. I’m not worried, because I know you’re happy. You haven’t stopped smiling since you told me you were pregnant.”

  “Happy is an understatement. I can’t wait for him to be born. I love him so much already, and we still have a few months before he arrives.”

  “I know what you mean. It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

  “It is. I just wish I was feeling a bit better.”

  I shifted a little so I could look at her. “You’re okay, right? Have you been counting your kicks and tracking his movement on the baby chart?”

  “Have you been reading the baby books again?” she asked while giving me a smirk.

  “Yes, and you should be too. Shelby, are you okay?”

  “Sure, I am. I guess it’s new mom jitters.”

  “Dr. Tillman didn’t mention any concerns at your last appointment, did he?”

  “No, he said all was progressing along and I’m right on schedule. I guess I just would have felt more at ease if the baby was moving around more.”

  “Well, that’s why I asked you about the kick count. Honey, if you want to give him a call and have another ultrasound performed, then I say let’s do it. I don’t want to see you worrying if a simple scan will make you feel better.”

  “It’s fine, I’m just looking into things that are not there. I talked to my doctor about this, and he assured me at my appointment all was fine. You’ve had me pull back from working down in the stables and over at the dude ranch.”

  “Yes, and you know why. I asked you to take it easy and just work in the office, but you pushed yourself and almost got hurt.”

  “I was fine, Shane. You overreacted.”

  “Are we going to fight about this? Because if we are, you can forget it. When I saw Sampson nearly trample you, I thought my fucking heart had stopped. Knowing you are safe and at home gives me the peace I need to leave you each and every day while I go to work.”

  “Well, no worries there, because I’m home a lot.” She went to move away from me, but I already anticipated this move and held her close to me.

  “What about the nursery? You know my mom has offered to help you.”

  “I know she has, but I’m happier designing it myself.”

  “Fine. I was just pointing out that you are not as alone as you think you are.”

  “Shane, you’ve been working so much lately, you don’t even stop home for lunch anymore.”

  “Babe, work never stops when you live on a ranch. I’m sorry I’ve been missing some time with you, but once I get home from my trip, I promise my schedule will lighten up a bit. You haven’t said anything about it, but you know I have to leave at the end of the week, right?”

  “Don’t remind me,” she said, begrudgingly.

  “Shelby…” I whispered against her neck as I pulled her closer to my side, desperately wanting to end this bullshit between us.

  “It’s fine. I knew what I signed on for when I married you. This ranch is part of you, and I know you want it to be part of our son’s life too.”

  “Shelby, you make it sound as if it’s a prison sentence. Is that tone really necessary? It hurts my feelings. Are you not happy here? This is our home, a home that I built for us.”

  “Oh, Shane, I’m sorry. Call it pregnancy brain or whatever those stupid books say. I love you. I love our life here at Fairchild, and I know our son will too.” She kissed me and then wrapped her arms around my neck, assuring me the best way she knew how.

  My only problem was that once she touched me, I felt doubt, and I hated to ever feel that way. When I looked into her eyes, I wanted to see her happy eyes smiling back at me, but there was the doubt that made me not b
elieve Shelby. I was better than this, and she was too. I shook it off and trusted that she would be as open and honest with me as I had always been with her.

  “Okay, I’ll be back in a week. I love you so much, and my parents, the staff, everyone is just a phone call away. Are you sure you don’t want to stay up at the main house? Connie said she would love to have you.”

  “No, as kind as her invitation is, I would rather stay here in our house. Remember, I have a nursery to finish.”

  I sighed at Shelby’s snarky response to my question. I tried a different approach. “Will you call Tenley? Maybe you can have lunch or go into town and do some shopping together.”

  “Shane, I appreciate what you are trying to do here, but I am fine. Go on your trip and hurry back so I can stop missing you.”

  “That’s my girl. I love you.”

  “I love you too.”

  I grabbed my duffle and headed over to my truck, looking back just enough over my shoulder to notice Shelby wiping away her tears. Fuck! It was killing me to leave her like this, and I hated myself for not running back to the house and just saying the hell with my business, but I started the engine and kept on going.

  Although I cut it short by a couple of days, my trip was successful. I couldn’t wait until the horses I acquired for Fairchild to arrive. They were just gorgeous, and the guys were going to go nuts over them.

  Unfortunately, I had minimal contact with my wife, which just hurt my heart. I got her voicemail a few times, and when we did talk, all she kept saying was that she and the baby were fine. Again, I doubted it, and that was when I decided to jump in my truck and make my way back home.

  I was on the road when Shelby called me in hysterics to the point that I could not understand what she was saying. It took me a few tries to calm her.

  “Shane, I think something’s wrong. Where are you?” she cried through the phone. Just hearing the fear in her voice made the hairs on my neck stand up.

  “Baby, I’m still hours away from the ranch. What’s going on?”

  “The last couple of days I haven’t been feeling the baby as much, and I’m really scared. I should have gone in yesterday, but I thought I was just being paranoid.”